Assalamu Alaykum.
I'm writing this post from a blank slate.
It's been a long while since my purposeful blogpost, and yes, I do miss it.
I miss writing down my thoughts.
I miss interacting with my readers (if ever they do exist).
I miss reading my old posts and ponder upon my seemingly-deep-but-not-really thoughts from the past.
I miss writing.
When and why did I stop?
Was it the "busy-ness" of being a doctor? Not really.
Was it the ever-dwindling self confidence I have? Maybe. I still don't know if my words would reach anyone's heart and change the world (No! I never really thought they would).
I have a lot in my mind. At this point in time, in my 30 years of existence... I have known what I am really good at: Making plans... and never actually get to finish any of it! haha!
But really, I wanna go back... I want to go back to writing my thoughts on an empty slate and just let the inks dry and fate decide what will come out of it.
Even if I fear that some people might not like what I am writing, I wanted to tell myself this: I am writing not for anybody else... but for myself. For the future me who will read these letters. These electronic letters that may or may not get lost in this ever expanding universe we call the internet.
I am nothing but a dot in this existence. But a single dot I am indeed that is unique and similar to everyone else at the same time. Ironic but true. We are all different yet alike. We are all the same yet are not. (Why am I turning into a philosophical couch right now? LOL.)
Maybe I will start by reviving this blog. I will try to reach a goal, maybe a post (or letter) once a week? yeah, that seems feasible. I hope. In shaa Allah, I will. (My wife will surely tell me I am adding more chores to my never-ending list of to-dos! haha!). But I really want to do it. I will.
Let's see how things will go.
The problem with making an update of something is... you need to define when was your "last" update. Was it last week? Last month? Last year??? Checking on my entries in this blog, my last update was actually from 2017! That was when I graduated from Medschool and passed the Physician Licensure Exam. How many years ago was that? FOUR YEARS. That's a lot. That is indeed a lot of catch-up to work on.
I haven't talked about my work as a Doctors to the Barrios (DTTB) in Matanog, Maguindanao. That was two (2) years worth of stories to tell. So much had happened and so much to talk about.Then my end of contract and my return to Sulu as a local physician. Again, a lot had happened. Then the pandemic came in. I bought a mountain bike. I tied the knot. And now where do we go next?
There's is just so much to talk about.
But all of those are in my head. Kept in my notebooks. Stored in my digital storage drivers. Waiting to be unfold. Can I really do it? Well, there's only one way to know. Let's find out starting today.
So, the next posts will be either of the following:
1. Previous activities, musings, realizations I had in the past 4 years as a doctor. Mostly inspirations and lessons I learned along the way (that I hope would also be useful to anyone reading this blog. I can't afford to waste your time...)
2. Some updates about what I am doing. I will try not to post anything too personal. I am trying not share too many private information. I have been a "public" for the past years since I discovered the wonders of the internet. I've made myself quite a presence in the internet (you don't believe me? Try searching my name. *humble brag* ehem.), and I regret that. I want some privacy, too.
Ironic isn't? I wanted to share my stories, the things that inspired me. The beautiful stories of Sulu. And yet, I wanted to keep some things private for myself, too. I'll have to decide on this. On where to draw the line. What I will decide to share to the world and what I won't.
As a starter, here's a wonderful photo of Sulu's majestic Buwd Tumantangis (Mt. Tumantangis).
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| (read more about this majestic mountain here: https://bit.ly/3i3dydi) |
I will never get tired of looking at it.
Going home and seeing its glory is always a welcoming scene.
Like a warm embrace from a mother welcoming his son from a long journey away.
I am back.
Though I won't be staying for too long (in Sulu). Sadly.
But my heart will always be there.
My heart will always stay in Sulu.
Salam Kasilasa.
-Ahmad
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